Restless Nights

Getting to bed has been an easy task with the exception of Angela's continued note taking. Medications are given and prepped each eve in hopes they will not be necessary. Pain spikes occur primarily at night as does the over-active thought process.

Angela and I have concurred that we both have a creative time, 3:00 a.m. in which our creative minds seem to engage. We've looked at how we could capitalize on the quiet of the morn and apply our a.m. energy. 'Our creative time' has been altered though. Now I wake up as I feel her stir. As Angela wakes my senses heighten as I tap into where she is; is she up?.. adjusting her bones?...going to the bathroom?...is her body warm? is she breathing...??? She's been waking in somewhat of a panic, frustrated she can not sleep, 'over-active mind' she states. As of recently she uses an all too familiar term, Alzheimer’s 'Sundown Syndrome' of which my mother suffered. Perhaps her sundown reference is due to what her brain had gone through, the swelling associated with her extreme sodium levels. Perhaps Angela's brain is still in shock; her circuitry still smoldering from 5 Grand Mal seizures; maybe the intracranial pressure from the meningioma tumor...???

A dear friend of ours who is a U of M professor of pharmacology just visited and gave us the best pep talk we've had thus far. Simply put, "Quite putting emphasis on what the doctors say and get out in your garden, barefoot. Get dirty, get out in the air and sun... Angela's spiritual practice is what will heal her as well as all of her clean organic food; be surrounded by positive family and friends. Enlightened conversations and affirmations have so much more to offer than words of doom and gloom"... Words I needed to hear....